It was Friday afternoon, the end of a working week and the start of a long weekend of fun that had been almost a year in the planning. A couple of days previously, with a miserable weather forecast in hand, our destination had been changed and plans modified but now we were on the road. You’ve probably seen The A Team, The Expendables, The Italian Job etc. Well this was the same. 4 blokes on a mission: 4 blokes with diverse talents, employments, family situations, and hygiene standards all together with one purpose. Actually that was probably as far as it went when it came to similarities with the aforementioned films. But all the camaraderie and the sense of escaping our mundane and messy ruts were there. We were soon enjoying relief and merriment just as recreational as overthrowing a dictator, exploding a bad guy or bagging bullion.
Our jollity wasn’t just about the fun we were getting away for, it was also about the stuff we were getting away from; not just what was in front of us but also what was behind us: frustration with colleagues, overwhelming work commitments, employment uncertainties, difficult decisions, domestic complexities, financial strain, oppressive responsibilities, the stubbornness of circumstances, questions about direction… Leaving this stuff behind meant we could lower our defences and enjoy the present. This we did, conspicuously and noisily.
Escapism is sometimes seen as irresponsible. We can feel guilty for even thinking about it. We often feel we have to justify it. It is frequently frowned on as a shirking of our responsibilities, a cowardly running away, an immature abandonment of the things and people who depend on us. Escapism can be all of these things. Whether it is depends on things like our timing, how we leave things and what we escape to. There are lots of poor escapes and many websites and industries devoted to luring us into them.
Perhaps retreat is a better word than escape. Retreat implies, ‘I’ll be back.’ Which sounds far more manly, heroic even.
As the long journey went on and as the reality of being reunited with our chums in something simple, enjoyable and satisfying grew so the tight grip and constant focus we usually had on our web of responsibilities, real and imagined began to relax. Concerns about work and home receded with the miles and were replaced by jolly banter and stirring ambitions. On the occasions, over the weekend, when we did happen to consider our regular responsibilities they seemed to have shrunk to sensible and manageable dimensions. Conundrums seemed to have found themselves resolutions and fog replaced by clarity. During our fun and adventure it was usually the good and delightful aspects of life in the real world that floated to mind and these catalysed appreciation, gratitude and praise. Compliments about one another were even heard.
Being able to talk about things in the real world, as and when we felt like it, with folk who cared but weren’t involved, had its benefits too. Sometimes this was simply because the contributions they made were so hilariously inappropriate we were reassured of our own decision making abilities. And there was a lot of hilarity. The emotional, psychological and physiological benefits of laughter are well documented but during the weekend we, at times, enjoyed physically dangerous, road accident causing levels of laughter – particularly as we commented on experiences we’d all been a part of.
Retreat is good for us. A retreat with friends and an enjoyable purpose has special benefits.
- How often do you retreat like this?
- How often do you enjoy the recreation of getting away with a band of likeminded collaborators?
- With whom can you enjoy retreat?
- When is your next retreat booked into your diary / machine?
Thanks for the weekend, gentlemen.
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